I keep telling myself that one day it will get a little better, I just have to be a little more patient. These next two semesters are going to kill me I have a feeling no just stress level but also financially. I feel that I am not ready to deal with anymore stress but I know that if God will bring me to it you will be bring me through it. No worries.

It is weird to look at where you have been and see who walked in your life and standing in the present seeing how many of those are actually still here.

VMA RESPONSE

So everyone should know by now what happened at the VMA's. If not Taylor Swift won best female music video award and she beat like Beyonce and Lady GaGa and some others and I think that it was the first time that a country musician has ever won an award like that on VH1 and you could just tell in her face how shocked that she was and excited and in the middle of her speech Kanye West decides that just because he is Kanye West that he can get up out of his seat and go on stage and take the mike and say excuse me taylor and say that Beyonce deserved this more and left poor Taylor there not knowing what to say. How can someone do something so stupid?? I guess if a Republican can call Obama the president of the US in Congress a liar in front of everyone then Kanye can do this to Taylor. What is our world coming to when you have no respect for the person next to you? What gives you the right to ruin the speech of someone in a formal setting or ruin one of the biggest moments in a person's life or career? Even though I might not agree with someone I will give them their moment and listen to what one had to say without showing them disrespect. If we would all be just a little bit more respectful and loving toward one another no matter how we felt oh how this world would be different.

Today was a hard day. Some things never change.....my head is held high and I will do the best that I can and kill you with kindness :)

:)

So when I saw BB's blog I got jealous and got a xanga flashback and realized how much I missed actually blogging or whatever you hip cats call it these days. It helps to easy my mind and helps to sort through things and to also keep all of those who I hold dear up to date with me especially since I have been a little bad lately about keeping in contact. So here is my life thus far....

I currently work two jobs which together equals a little over forty hours a week plus selling AVON on the side. I am also a full time graduate student who currently is taking nine hours which is freaking insane. I am also starting tomorrow teaching a class for grades 1-4 grade on missions and part of me doesn't know what I was thinking when I said sure I will do that. I guess I am just trying to kill myself :)

I have an amazing boyfriend with whom I will celebrate ten months with this Saturday. I am absolutely in love with him and find myself falling more and more in love with us everyday. He keeps me sane through this hard time in my life. I wonder sometimes what is so special about me that he decides to stay with me even when those I love treat him badly.

I am in a difficult stage at this point of my life. I thought the drama was over in college but I sure as heck was wrong. I am engorged in it more and more everyday from workplace drama to family drama. I am ready to venture out into life and live my life without restrictions from those around me. I want to be me without someone judging me because they do not agree with me or ESPECIALLY don't UNDERSTAND the circumstances nor the person.

Well anyways, I think that's enough maybe a little more dramatic than I would have liked but hey that's me right now in this moment and its true and honest and ugly and beautiful at the same time :)