Do you ever wish your life was different? That someone else's life would be better than living your own? I think that sometimes we all think about that and think someone's life would be better than our own. Whose life would you choose? Would you want to be Angelina Jolie? Would you like to know what it feels like to be loved by a man named Brad Pitt? Would you like to know what it feels like to have the ability to help with world like she does? Would you like the amount of money she has in her pocket and bank account? But what does she kind behind that smile and those eyes? Do you know her worries and her fears? When she as Atlas holds up her world what are the weights it holds for her? Would you like to live that life of a friend or family member? What about a famous singer? Would you want to be Beyonce?? She has a figure that guys kill for and her voice is like the angels in heaven when she sings. She can dance like nobody's business and married to a great rapper. But what does she think about before she goes to bed at night? She lives all her life in the limelight and every second of her life is taped or photographed and she can no longer but out and about in the world and just become a face in the crowd. If you could live someone's life which life would you live?

Me.....that would be a hard one. My life is definitely not perfect but I think no matter who I wished to become I would and always be me just in a different body. I would still think the same and act the same because of the woman I am. No matter what costume I put on I am still Jennifer at the end of the day. I am content with that :) Live life to the fullest and do the best the can with what you got. Be a blessing to others. Can you ask for anything more?

Times are tough. Life is tough. It wasn't I don't think we would appreciate the small things that God blesses us with. Today one of my dreams that was in reach just slipped to a higher level but it was my fault all the same. We have to deal with the consequences no matter the reasons that led up to the event. I had my crying time and now I am trying to focus on the blessings that I have. My God is still in control and He will sustain me through this hard time. I will be that which I dream to be. It just might take a little longer.

This summer has taught me a lot about myself. It is funny to look at the woman I was when I graduated from OBU and the woman I am today. I find it incredible the amount of confidence I have in myself and how I will stand up more for myself and what I believe in my heart to be right. I am not afraid to be myself and to be bold in my opinion and I do not shy away from speaking my opinion. I think on the down side I am less trusting with people. There are only a few that I trust and find myself trusting less and less people and that includes my own family. How sad is that right? My mom was right in some regard that I was naive in some sense but my eyes are open and I doubt that I will ever look at the world or some people in the same way as before. I am more cold hearted than I used to be and that is a hard one to face. I love people and learning about them but a lot of encounters that I have had with people have left me not wanting to try to see reason and see the person that Christ would love. That is one thing that I am working hard to overcome.

I have learned there is only two people that you can completely trust wholeheartedly and that is Christ and yourself. I try to live each day as if it were my last and breathe in all the moments that I can to savor them and be thankful that Christ gave me another day to live and to experience and how blessed I am to know Him and that even though to a lot of people I am a hopeless piece of work but to Him I am a continuous work in progress :)